July 28, 2010
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{reality mom}
You know you’re a mom when….Checking out in a popular teenage store where you were buying birthday presents for your nieces,
and fumbling to get your wallet from your purse, out drops your 4 year olds pink & purple Barbie underwear on the counter….You glance up at the super manicured looking sales guy who’s eyes go from the underwear to your belly, then back again.
And as you stand there for that eternal awkward second…
feeling the eyes in the line behind you,
knowing any attempt at an explanation of what happens when a 4 year old proclaims, “i dotta doe potty white now… ” is pointless -
You try to ignore the hot flash of embarrassment creeping up your face,
as you quickly wad up the pretty Barbie faces smiling back at you, stuff it deep into your purse, and say…“Well, ya gotta love that Spandex!”
…..some quotes that made me laugh recently…..
“The phrase ” working mother ” is redundant.”
“My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint.
“I’m not going to vacuum ’til Sears makes one you can ride on.”
“I’d like to be the ideal mother, but I’m too busy raising my kids.”
¸.·´¸.·¨) ¸.·¨)
(¸.·´ (¸.·´ (¸.·¨¯`♥ amber
What’s been some of your reality mom moments??
Leave a comment and answer: You know you’re a mom when________________.
Comments (58)
Mine’s not so funny but it was a touching mom moment. My middle child left for high school cheer camp this morning. When I dropped her at the school to catch the bus she still hugged and kissed me and yelled, “Bye, Mommy! I love you!” in front of the whole squad. It was wonderful that she’s not “too cool” for that …. yet.
LOL~ oh Amber that is hilarious. Humor~ always my first choice.
~when you drive a red 15 passenger van~ and can put together a Little League with your own family.
I loved this…and I’m just a Dad.
You know you’re a mom….if you have ever written a check in CRAYON!! (yep, banks will actually accept that!)
Don’t worry about the “barbie panty” incident, it probably embarrassed him way more than it did you! ha!
You know you’re a mom when you go to your underwear/bra drawer and you choose- your white nursing bra, your white nursing bra, or your other white nursing bra!
I’m just thinkin’ that sales guy was wondering how that hot blonde could possibly be a mother! Probably feeling a lot of confusion!
I loved the “I’d like to be the ideal mother, but I’m too busy raising my kids.” That would be me!
I’ll have to think about how to fill the one-liner in on the end. Hmmm. I’ll be back.
You know you’re a mom if you’ve ever wiped a snotty nose with your bare hand!
…You see something in the store/hear about an activity and your first thought is not “Would I like that?” but “Oh, the kids would LOVE that!”
…You hurt more for them than you do for yourself.
By the way, loved the last quote about too busy raising my kids to be an ideal Mom. I think that should be my motto.
And funny story about the underwear. Really, all you can do is laugh, right?
You know you are a mommy when you say things like “is this wet because it dropped in the toilet”? or “Get that off the ceiling”
Or the people you spend most of your time with are very short and announce to you when they need to “go potty”
Or you go to a good friend’s house and your conversation is interrupted with a dirty diaper change or a child(ren) who decided to go swimming, fully clothed.
(Had a great time yesterday)
You know you’re a mom when you have to remind the people around you to stop saying the word “poop”!
…you’re singing a duet in front of church and someone keeps licking your hand.
my older boys actually had to tell me to stop calling it “potty”. You may have that too with the baby being younger. Funny a teenager just doesn’t want to be asked to go potty ;-P
My MIL used to say the ironing was her “favorite indoor sport” and would iron my hubby’s shirts when she came to visit and my kids were little. Isn’t that sweet?
I love the riding vacuum idea! Sounds good to me. Why should we not get to sit while working?
I’ll have to think about the “you know when you’re a mom when”.
You know you’re a Mom when your child announces in public that they have to go potty and you say, “Pee or poop?” because you want to know if you should be looking for the nearest tree or an actual restroom. Help! How did I become like this?!;)
You panic and ask your husband where the youngest child is and he tells you that you are holding him
)
Oh my goodness! The undie incedent…You should have said “What? I wear those when I work out”! He would have awed!
….if you are more in love with those little people following you, then chocolate itself!
@pettybunch - HAHA—-then wiped it on your jeans (or during soccer—in the grass) because you had nothing else, obviously!!
Or instead of picking the toys up that accumulated in the living room, you just kick them to one side or the other—enough for a nice little path because if you thought about cleaning it up, it would be spread out within a matter of minutes again anyway.
I have some more, but can’t think of them at the moment!! I’m still laughing over the snot thing!!! Cause I do that alot with Lilly!! LOL!!!
When you rock back and forth while standing in the checkout line.
Well, you’re either a Mom or a mental patient…… (or both) <I:D
when you’ve tossed perfectly good clothes in a random dumpster or on the side of the road because no outfit is worth cleaning up THAT size mess. If one of my kids ever looks randomly unclothed – now you’ll know why.
When without thought you holler to every person entering the bathroom (whether they happen to be your child or not), “HIT THE WATER!”
we were all livin in a cave until just last week
so surely you can offer some grace and understanding
when I tell ya that I had to say at dinner the other night,
“you’re not allowed to use piggy toes to hold your fork!”
@Mrs. Troop -
LOLOLOL…SO true!!!!
Amber this is so funny! He was probably thinking “wow, she stills wears barbie?” LOL
~you have cheerios, binkies, and little girl panties in your purse!!
Maybe super manicured sales guy whose eyes went to your belly
needed to hear, “Now ya know how i ended up like this!”
you know you are a mom when your bathing suit top gets pulled down while in the community pool after telling your son repeatedly NOT to pull on it. Talking about embarrassing! Lifeguards got a free peep show.. LOL
….when because Sunday mornings are so crazy, in the car you realize you forgot your lipstick. You dig around in your purse and find a tube of your girls play lipstick called “violet shine”….and you actually put it on. :-/
Here are my You-know-you’re-a-(jr.)mom-when’s….http://grace-not-linda.xanga.com/654004339/item/
=) <3you
Gosh, I *love* reading your posts. The’re just so *wonderful* you have a great sense of humor too *grins* Loved your story
lol..too funny. such a cute picture of you and Emma!
Most embarrassing moments post coming soon huh?
ya know you’re a mom when you put the milk in the cupboard and the cereal in the refrigerator
thanks for the laughs today ladies
Always enjoy your pictures!
@ToLiveLoved - you rocked that color! i just know it!
having so much fuN *laughing*snorting*awwwwing*and nodding my head in agreement* reading through the comments…
had to come back and finish what i was writing ^ cause – you know you’re mom when…. you can’t finish commenting on a post without hearing, “mom… ?”
@hananielsgirl -
“Or you go to a good friend’s house and your conversation is interrupted with a dirty diaper change or a child(ren) who decided to go swimming, fully clothed.” – i so enjoyed you guys being here! thank you so much for the food & gift. i keep looking at those shoes.. ready to fill them.
love you
you know you’re a mom when you keep reprimanding the child beside you to quit playing with the stuff on display in Books A Million, and then you finally LOOK at the child and it’s not one of yours! =) Thanks for some humor tonight~ =)
@aretheyallyours - ROFL!! ~that is so totally true!!!!
Im still laughing cuz I thought I was the only one!!:)
LOL I can relate…I recently found some Dora panties in my purse, and do not remember what occasion I put them in there for!
@twofus_1 - LOL I laughed til I cried at that! Licking your hand…. soooo funny.
… your heart stops when someone yells mom or a tiny baby cries.
… people start referring to you as “_______’s mom”.
… you’re no longer phased by bodily fluids. Pee, poop, blood, puke… been there done that… had the T-shirt, but, um, it’s dirty. LOL
… you’re up late to catch up on Xanga because your day is so consumed with beautiful kids.
I love this Amber! This was a great laugh at the end of my day. Thanks!!
I know when a Mom parks near me by the sound of sippy cups rolling around the floor of her van.
When a baby 3 aisles over cries and you start swaying to quiet it. (I’ve done that, actually)
You make a lot of noise to cover the sound of the pop can opening.
You know you’re a mom when….you put yourself in time out…..and it’s a TREAT!
….you know your a mom when you can relate to allllllll of these comments!!!
those pictures are priceless.
my mom is the best and i know shes had moments like this.
Mine isn’t a related to motherhood but it is related to underwear. Every year I go in for a skin exam (I had skin cancer) and they give me the gown and tell me to take everything off except for my underwear. So, I complied. The doctor came in and told me to spin around so that he could check my back. Right then I realized I had a wedgy riding up one side of my buns. I had a split second to make a decision. Do I pull it out in front of him, before I spin around? Or do I spin around and pretend I didn’t know half of my underwear was riding up? Talk about embarrasing
Tami
Ya… Gotta watch out 4 that.
…. when all your movie choices are animated.
You know you’re a mother when you laugh when your 5 and 6 year old spill a gallon of white paint on your hardwood floors you simply laugh… or when you walk into your bathroom and find Vaseline all over your counter tops and faucets with a thin layer of lavender baby powder sprinkled on top of it you don’t give it a 2nd thought or ask why
@down_onthefarm - so you’re cave girl now????? you lead quite the interesting life i must say.
This was so fun to read…. one of mine would be that I would truely put myself in harms way for the safety of my kids. That’s just how my heart works since mommyhood.
LOL (more like guffaw) at your story!!!! Also the ironing/bunk bed thing–totally hilarious.
You know you’re a mom when finding the triple antibiotic cream in the cereal cupboard doesn’t even surprise you.
You know you’re a mom (to babies, anyway) when you come to EXPECT drool/spit-up spots on your shirt beyond the first hour of wear…
I found a pancake in my van.
@singingrachel - farms. caves. whateva. just waiting for all the training to pay off. snort.
This post and these comments were SO funny and interesting. I had to think too, about how someone wrote about things you never thought you’d hear yourself say. Like “Don’t throw your teddy bear into the ceiling fan” or “No, its not OK to poop outside.” Like…really?? Did I ever picture myself saying some of the sentences that come out of my mouth?
Loved all of this interaction!
@down_onthefarm -
you are so NORMAL!!!
love you.
This is hysterical!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You know, I can totally see why he was confused.
B/c you are young and beautiful …. just not that young, huh? 
Loved the quotes, too, especially the ideal mom one. You know you’re a mom when you start calling kids by the wrong names. HOW did I end up doing this with only two??????????