April 20, 2010

• {Mini Me & The Egg Heads}
  
  I’ve never seen myself in any of my kids…

  I see my husband. My mother in law. Even my brothers.

  But for the most part, when I look at them they just seem like their own little people to me~
  just them. and nobody else.

  Except…

  When Emma makes funny faces.

  Then…

  I see a slight resemblance.

  
  
  
  
  
   
  But even if they’re not always looking like me in their physical appearance, their actions and attitudes are a different story.
  It seems every day I come face to face with three mirrors that very accurately display my true reflection.
  And the sight I’m confronted with isn’t always pretty.
  There can be a lot of ug-lay.
  Ugly I’m not even aware that’s in my heart until I see it in one of them.

  I long ago knew that this whole mommy thing was something I couldn’t do on my own… I am completely disabled without Christ.
  That’s kinda easy to admit.
  But recognizing something needs changing and actually changing it~
  That’s kinda not so easy. 

  They say the definition of insanity is to keep doing the same thing expecting a different result.

  Well, I’ve been seeing some insanity setting in. There’s some areas where I really feel God is waking me up and showing me the urgency to not just nod my head and agree with Him, but get up and follow His direction and walk in what He’s telling me to do. And yup~ nodding and walking are completely different things. I often find myself quite comfortable to just sit and nod. I’ve got the nodding part down pretty good now. But the walking after Him…. that takes commitment. sacrifice. A deliberate, conscious choice.

  And I’m not talking about trying harder.
  Revving myself up to be the super mom who produces super kids.

  I believe with all my heart that kids don’t turn out because of their parents, but often.. in spite of their parents.
  God’s grace is amazing that way to fill in all the areas we miss, don’t see, forget to cover, or didn’t realize until later! 

  
   
  What I’m talking about is just having a fresh perspective ignited in my heart lately that our kids are sponges and will absorb whatever is spilling over from our life~ whether good or bad.
  There really is a lot of truth behind the little saying, “more is caught than taught.”
  And if I want my kids to be passionate about Jesus Christ~ well, I better be giving them a glimpse of what that looks like.

  And I’m not sure it always looks like the things that I allow to occupy most of my time, energy, efforts and thoughts.

  Not long ago one of the kids asked Shayne what it meant to “Walk in the Spirit.” He explained it like this~
  “It’s kind of like having two dogs inside you.. one white, the other, black. And whatever dog you feed the most.. that’s the one that’s going to be the strongest.”
  I loved that simple illustration. It comes to mind often.
  And that’s exactly what I’m feeling lately– that there’s some “bags of dog food” around our home, in our hearts, that need tossing out!  

  It’s so easy for me to switch to auto pilot in my Christian life {which is where I’ve been living lately}.
  To find myself going through the motions without genuine sincerity…
  Falling into the trap of wanting to merely check a box on a list, rather than listening {truly listening} to that still small voice inside.
  Let’s be honest.. in the Christian life going through the motions and checking boxes is often more “convenient” than following the Spirit.
  Because boxes are easier. tidy. all packaged and sealed and looking like they’re supposed to. 
  But God and how He works in our lives can’t be wrapped up so neatly and certainly not contained to one box ~
  if anything when Jesus was here on earth He blew all Christian boxes out of the water!!
  We can’t always explain or understand what God is asking of us.. and that’s okay.
  It’s not for us to always explain or understand – it’s for us to simply have faith and obey.

  And our kids know.. they know if we’re box checkers or truly listening to Jesus. 
  We often can tell what’s inside our own hearts by what is played out in our children’s lives…
  Sometimes the evidence of what comes back is sobering and you realize it’s time for some “reprogramming of the sponges,” as one friend of mine put it so well.
  Which means there needs to be some re programming of some things in our own lives as parents to begin with.
  That’s where we’re at. Addressing some obvious changes that need to happen. {Maybe I’ll share more in a future blog}

  When I stop and read back over this I can’t help but to smile…
  kind of a half sigh/ half smile thing actually.
  My life is such a broken record.
  Often coming back to the same old same old just on different battle fronts.

  I used to think I’d get to a place in life {eventually} where I’d have it all figured out…
  that spiritual plateau where you can stand and look down on those less fortunate who aren’t there yet.
  Oh, and it exists alright because I’ve seen those that are there.

  But I don’t know… more and more I find it rather freeing to simply realize life is a forever classroom and perfection is an “illusion.”
  Because if it weren’t– Why would we need Him? 

  = = ~ = = ~ = = ~ = = ~ = =

  We had a fun lunch yesterday… …
   

    

  Though I didn’t realize how scary some of them looked until I posted this picture!! :/
  Next time we need to work on those pepper lips a bit more, I think.

  Perhaps having some good ole Jones’ Root Beer to wash it all down helped deter from the scary egg head sandwiches staring up at them!
  A special, “summery” kind of treat for sure!

  I just like how the bottles look myself. : ) 

  

  = = ~ = = ~ = = ~ = = ~ = =

  Emma had collected some rocks from the driveway the other day and was washing them off in the sink.
  When she couldn’t seem to get the spots off one and was growing frustrated I told her that’s how it was made.

  “But who made dem?” She asked.

  “Well… God did.”

  She looked at the rock and turned it over several times in her hand, her forehead wrinkling in thought.

  “But how did He det dem down here?”

  “Hmmm…” Wanting to simplify the eternally long Creation/Flood explanation I said, “I guess He makes them in heaven and just throws them over.”

  Without questioning my theory or giving it a second thought she answered quickly, “Well, why doesn’t He do dat wif candy too?”

  Good point.

  = = ~ = = ~ = = ~ = = ~ = =

  Thanks so much to Rachel for the adorable skirt and ruffle pants in the photos below~ and to Danya for the sweet headband!
  Both your packages arrived on the same day. So fun. and so very thoughtful!!!

        

  
   

  “Your home is the single most powerful arena on earth to change a life for God.”

  amber.
  

  • 2:30 pm
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